Tuesday 10 April 2012

Bully the Movie

Bullying

Here's something interesting, at least to me. Bully the Movie.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1682181/

Basically somebody has realised that bullying is an issue that needs highlighting once again and has made a rather shocking (if of course you lived on the moon or were teachers) documentary showing a small sample of the abuse many alienated young people suffer.

Now I'm not going to go on into a long background about the movie, but there are a few points I want to make. First of all the MPAA, the gang over in America responsible for their rating system, gave it too high a rating for it's target audience (around 18, or their equivalent over there). Apparently it "contained scenes that may be shocking to younger people". I am forced to ask; what like? Teenage boys and girls being attacked by gangs, insulted and emotionally abused to the point were some go as far as to take their own life? Yes, that is something young children should be protected from… but hiding it away encourages it you feckless fools! That the MPAA did not know this tells me that they are among the hundreds of thousands out there that think just because they don't see it happening it doesn't.

Fortunately this rating has been effectively repealed and the film is now able to be seen by those that most need to see it. The problem is I don't think it can do much good and I have the experience to tell you why.

Now I'm not going to suddenly announce that I was one of the many victims, the fact is don't see myself as that. I can however emphasise. I was regularly bullied in school one way or another. At least twice, without warning, I was attacked and several times chased by groups. Once I was even knocked out, briefly. I regularly had gangs of all ages (even younger than I was) hound me, throwing out insulting nick names. Mostly plays on my last name Fishwick; these included Dick-wick, Fishy-dick and other obvious penis related jabs.

I am not saying I've had the worst of it, or that other people should just grow up and accept it but wasn't pleasant.

Other, more creative insults came about with rumours of me being sexually attracted to my own, then as now deceased, grandmother and Bea Arthur for some reason. People I did not know in the slightest would hound me after school with these taunts and others. When I responded (usually physically to their great amusement) it would be me that got in trouble with teachers for being violent. Again becoming some great cosmic joke.

Often leading to me losing my lunch times and being forced to remain in detention for an hour or more after school. On on occasion I was even held back a class because I lashed out during a lesson (a lesson I could not hear because I had four other pupils openly talking about my so called sexual habits). There were other problems, but I'm sure you get the idea.

This of course continued until I got to college. At which point I became the focus of a whole new level of amusement. My work with Scouts made me a pedophile, other people began asking obviously inane questions until distraction. Imagine being forced to tell the same moron that despite coming from a small town you do not in fact have six toes (all on one foot) and that you're not married to a sister you do not have.

None of this made me suicidal, but I can understand how people could fall into despair. Especially without support. I also know I am not alone out there in the big wide world. The problem is there is no easy fix, one movie no matter how powerful can change it and there is one simple reason why.

Social structure.

We are naturally a social animal. We gravitate towards those we feel connected to, either through shared opinion or occurrences. We make friends who we feel comfortable around because we can talk to them and we avoid people we can't. As a people we humans need that structure, that society and that bond. Without it we all feel that most painful and obscure hurt. Loneliness.

This is where bulling comes from, people seeking to establish their own friends the only way they can think, by alienating someone else. Bullies are so afraid of the loneliness they see in others that they go out of their way to stop it. Causing it wherever they go because if they stop they are terrified they will become the bullied. Literally shouting at the top of their voice everyone else's problems, so no one will look to closely at their own.

Highlighting this alone isn't going to help anything. It's primal, rooted so far down that we can't pull it out. Our only hope is to acknowledge it, face fear and ignorance head on and battle with it. This is why people ignore it, because they don't want to see it in themselves. This is why they do it, because they are the one's that are too afraid to accept who they are. I have seen people change their whole personalities to fit in

This is why I pity them, not myself. I'm glad to be unique, not one of the crowd. I'm not afraid of who I am. A short, irritating know it all with bad teeth, short temper and an attitude to match. I am me in defiance to all those people and I actually think them for that.

Before I sign this off thI do want to say two things. I don't know if we're going to get this film over here (UK) but if you're in the US support it as best you can. Despite my reservations. I might not sound wholly positive about the out come but I have been wrong often and very rarely have I wanted that to be proven more than I am here.

Second is to repeat the thing I said when my mother and I had a meeting with my teachers about the whole thing. My tutor said:- "Thomas has difficulty communication with his peers." I responded by looking at the moron and saying "You're not calling those people my peers are you?"


Thomas